Something that bothers me more than almost anything else in the world is when people say "I deserve to be happy." Because the reality is, that not everything that's worth it is necessarily going to make you happy. When I am on the 11th mile of an 18 mile run, I am certainly not "happy." Sometimes, it's not about us being happy, it's about us taking responsibility which ultimately leads to change, and then leads to the right kind of happiness.
I would have never lost 90lbs (almost 100:) if my sole desire was to be "happy." Ice cream made me happy, pizza also made me happy. Vegetables actually make me quite angry. But taking responsibility for myself, my eating, my health and my body has led me to happiness in an extremely painful way.
I recently set some major boundaries in my life. Setting these boundaries were painful. They certainly didn't make me happy. But setting these boundaries was a necessary evil to lead me back to the person I wanted to be. In finally setting those boundaries, I'm seeing the person I want to be emerge again. This is the person who desires to serve and gets excited about giving, not because I'm told "I have to," but because my heart truly desires to choose this. Sometimes pain leads to happiness.
"Happiness is not a goal, it is a by-product" ~Eleanor Roosevelt